embracing evolution
Finding purpose in uncontrollable circumstances
“When we find ourselves in situations we are unable to change, we are challenged to change ourselves instead.”
My intuition called me to open an old book the other night and I landed on a page with that quote highlighted, speaking about how trauma doesn’t just scar us, but it has the acute ability to completely transform us. (The book I opened was Motherless Daughters, but it took this quote from another book, Man’s Search for Meaning.)
This reminder couldn’t have come at a better time for me. I’ve been struggling with chronic illness behind the scenes for a while now, forcing me to slow down, move in with family, and focus on recovery and rebuilding on a much slower timeline than the pace of everyday life.
And if you guys know me, you know that I am a firecracker. I am always having big visions and wanting to move onto the next creation. I am usually moving on a much faster timeline than the pace of everyday life. Accepting my situation and the limitations of my body has been incredibly difficult. More difficult than I would be able to put into words.
And yet, as the quote says, in immovable situations “we are challenged to change ourselves instead.” This period of my life standing still has taught me so many new lessons. It’s forced me to evaluate all my relationships and set stronger energetic boundaries; to confront my sense of identity outside of being of service, which is where I began to rediscover my art and creativity; and to learn how to live slowly and build sustainably, like the tortoise not the hare.
I can honestly say that I see how this period of my life is completely necessary, because there were versions of me I still needed to face, ones I had gotten so comfortable with avoiding that I maybe never would’ve taken the time to acknowledge, if the things I grasped to so tightly weren’t stripped away.
So if you find yourself in a currently unchangeable circumstance, maybe there’s a hidden wisdom there you’ve yet to unlock. It might not be the easy path, but it will be the one that makes you stronger.
For me that has always been the case. Every negative experience I’ve had has always taught me something to get me to where I am today, to the point where I begrudgingly now always see the deeper meaning and grow through difficult circumstances in real time, even as I admittedly sometimes resent the gods for giving me a life path that has forced me to take on “Resilient” as my unofficial middle name. Some lessons we truly only understand once we are forged in the fire.
My mom may have passed away, but I learned how to become my own emotional safety. I may have been mistreated in the past, but it’s made me incredibly perceptive and discerning to those around me, and it’s what fueled me to become a coach and an emotional safe space for others. Unhealthy living and work situations were fire giving me purpose to forge a more fulfilling path. Struggling with health has shown me what’s really important and taught me to protect my energy.
And you may be unhappy with the current life circumstances you are in, but the change you seek comes from within you, not around you. In fact, the universe demands that you go first. If you enter a healed reality with a broken mind, all you will see are shards of glass; the world is a mirror to your distortions until you choose to face them.
If you need help starting that journey, you know where to find me 😉
